Article written by Curtis

3 Responses

  1. carsholtz
    carsholtz 6 August, 2012 at 9:44 am | | Reply

    Curtis, I think the difficulty often comes in when one member of the dialogue has based their opinion on their “feelings” about the issue, their personal experience, or what someone else has either told them or prepped them to say.

    I recently had a conversation with someone who was trying to argue for the idea of homosexuality being OK. He tried to base his argument on “contradictions in scripture”, gave me a couple instances he called examples, but when I questioned them he didn’t know where they were actually found. Funny thing is, I have since tried to dig deep to find anything remotely resembling the examples he gave and can’t find them.

    At the time, I challenged him that he needed to be careful not to just take the word of others, but to dig deep and make sure that his beliefs were REALLY his beliefs and not something that someone else gave him to use as ammunition or argument that just happened to fit what he, in his heart, WANTED to believe.

    I’m afraid that often there is a tendency to want to take the easy way out and not to really know what we believe and WHY we believe it, but to just regurgitate what we have heard others say, which my or may not be accurate. Then there is a tendency to become defensive when the argument is challenged and they have nothing to fall back on to prove their point.

    You’ve got to know both what you believe and why you believe it and have facts to show to prove your point. The problem happens when one of those pieces is missing. Defensiveness leads to argumentitiveness. It’s never fun to talk to someone who feels like they’ve been backed into a corner and have to talk their way out of it! :?

  2. Kari Scare
    Kari Scare 6 August, 2012 at 4:58 pm | | Reply

    Most of my life, I have avoided conversations that are of much controversy. I just never thought quickly enough to feel like I could converse without being sucked into the other person’s world, if that makes sense. Now, I realize how I need an understanding of some things in preparation for getting outside of my comfort zone somewhat in this area. This series is helping me understand how to think about tolerance and to approach controversial conversations by seeking to understand first. I appreciate how you are explaining the process, and I think it is going to help me a lot with future conversations.

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